Horizon
by Defiant.Anjeru
Summary: "She knew this moment wouldn't last; she would go back to Cerberus, and he to the Alliance, but she would enjoy it while it lasted, because if she was going to attempt a suicide mission, she would take this moment with her – cherish it – and use it as the reason to come back. Alive." My take on Horizon, what I would have liked. Fem!Shep/Kaidan. NSFW!


**A/N: **It's Shenko Smut Thursday! This is my first time participating, but safe to it is NSFW. Posted on my Tumblr, and reposted here. Leave a review if you have a moment, I would love it! :D

Disclaimer: Bioware.

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Shepard's eyes bore into Kaidan's back as he turned from her, his last words to her so condescending she wanted to rip out her hair in frustration. He'd greeted her with a warm embrace, one that had fired hope in her heart, but as they began talking, it was clear there was no hope. He didn't understand why she was with Cerberus, he didn't believe she had actually died, and had called her a traitor, accused her of turning her back on him; as he turned to leave, refusing to align himself with her and her terrorist organization, he told her to be careful. As if he cared.

"Kaidan!" She snapped out his name, her heart frantically fluttering in her chest. He stopped – or rather jerked to a stop – and turned to face her.

"What is it, Shepard?" He sighed and scrubbed a hand over his face, almost warily.

"You can't just say all that and walk away, Alenko," she fumed, her grip on her pistol so tight she worried her enhanced power may result in a slight damaged weapon. "I'm not that easy."

He scoffed. "Cleary – that's how Cerberus was able to get their hands on you," he drawled sarcastically.

Heavy silence followed his words as she stared at him, eyes having widened slightly in shock to his words. He looked immediately contrite, as if he wanted to take the words back, but he didn't, just stood there stoically, folding his arms over his chest.

"Shepard," Garrus reached out for her, talons gripping the armor over her shoulder. She grit her teeth and shook it off, turning her gaze to see what she had learned was a worried expression on the Turian's face. His mandibles tightened, and she knew he was frowning. "This is a waste of time, Commander. It's obvious Alenko refuses to believe you died."

"Garrus – "

"Shut up, Alenko," the Turian growled, surprising Shepard. "I don't want to hear your damned excuses."

"Now wait a minute – "

"Shut up!" Shepard snapped as she turned fully to her groundside team, Garrus and Jack. "Back to the shuttle, I need to speak with Lt. Kaidan Alenko in private."

"Shepard – "

"Go!" She snapped, impatiently. Jack shrugged with a scowl and turned to stomp off toward the other side of the colony where the shuttle had landed, Garrus lingering for a brief moment before he turned to do the same. She waited until they were out of sight before she turned back to look at Kaidan, who was watching her with hooded eyes and a concealed expression, lips pressed tightly together. A look she knew from the old days on the SR-1 Normandy, the one that she often saw when he wanted to say something but was inwardly warring with himself about whether or not to say it. She stalked toward him, grabbing his arm though he tried to pull away, and pulled him into the nearest colonist's home.

"Shepard – "

She released his arm and snapped around, her eyes narrowed angrily. "How dare you say those things to me, Kaidan. I _died_! What don't you understand about that?"

"Once you die, you're dead." He said stubbornly, leaning back against the wall. His jaw tightened and she found herself wanting to rip her hair out again – the bloody man was so stubborn! How did she make someone a believer when they so clearly didn't believe?

"Damnit, Alenko!" She slammed her palms against the wall on either side of his head, and leaned her face close to his. "I am not a traitor! Cerberus brought me back _from the dead_; _dead_, Kaidan. 100% dead. The Alliance left me for dead, _you _left me for dead, but they brought me back to stop the Collectors and damn it, I will stop them! With or without the Alliance, it doesn't matter; the collectors are a threat that cannot be ignored, like they continue to ignore the threat of the Reapers!" Her words fell angrily over his lips and his eyes narrowed, his hands fisting at his sides; from what she wasn't sure, anger, to restrain himself – she couldn't say.

"I didn't leave you for dead," he mumbled angrily. Defensively. "You told me to go. I…I didn't think anything would happen to you."

She sighed and dropped her forehead against his armored chest, her eyes stinging. "I had to save you Kaidan…I thought if I had to die to be able to do that, then so be it because I – " she cut off abruptly, realizing what it was that she almost said. She moved to retreat, but his hands caught her shoulders.

"Because you what?" He asked, sounding suddenly breathless. She swallowed thickly and raised her eyes to his face to find that familiar heat in his amber eyes that she had been thinking of from the moment she'd woken in that Cerberus space station.

"Because I loved you, you idiot." Her lips twitched into a slight smile. "And I still love you, even now. I must be an idiot too."

His eyes widened slightly, lips thinning tightly. His hands were tight on her shoulders and they stared at each for a long, intense, very silent moment, before cupped her face and slanted his lips across her own. She moaned immediately as her arms wound themselves around her neck, lips parting to allow his eager tongue entrance into her mouth. It felt like forever since she had kissed him, but she knew this must be worse for him – whereas she had been dead, he had been alive the last two years, mourning her, missing her, aching for her. She had blissfully unaware.

He murmured her name huskily against her lips as he turned them, and pressed her against the wall he'd been leaning on. His lips blazed a hot, wet trail over her jaw and neck and she moaned as he bit her pale skin, before laving his tongue across it soothingly. His hands were frantically pulling at the belt around her waist and for a brief moment, she could be thankful she didn't wear complicated armor on the lower half of her body. Greaves and leg plates, that was about it, and he used his biotics to pull off what he couldn't reach with his hands. She whimpered as a hand slid beneath her pants and between her legs, finding her core hot and wet for him, fingers sliding over her slick lips.

"You're so wet," he murmured against her neck, making his way back to her lips where he kissed her until her head was spinning pleasantly.

"Damnit Kaidan – I need you. _Now_." She shoved her hands against his shoulders and pushed him away, before walking him backwards to the sofa. He licked his lips as he seated himself, her hands nearly ripping away every piece of offending material in her way. Her fingers hooked in the sides of his skin tight spandex pants, yanking them down enough so that said fingers then could pluck his rock hard shaft free, exposing it to the cool air as he groaned low in his throat. She wriggled out of the rest of her armor, hastily throwing bits of it away, cursing every moment it took while Kaidan watched on, occasionally chuckling at her frustrated curses. "Laugh it up, Alenko," she mumbled when she was finally nude, giving him no time before she straddled his waist and, gripping his shoulders, wriggled her hips against his cock before seating herself upon it and letting him slide easily within her in one stroke.

He moaned, loud, his hands flying to catch at her hips, but he kept his eyes open and on her, no doubt rememorizing every detail of her; he had always enjoyed looking at her. And she had always enjoyed him looking. She needed him now, though, damnit, and she didn't wait long before she lifted her hips and began a frantic, fast, hard ride of the biotic beneath her. Her head fell back as she hissed with pleasure, her core accepting him eagerly with every fall of her hips. His hands tightened and began to help, slamming her down on his cock as he growled, his own head falling back now.

She rode him like there was no tomorrow and she knew that there could very well be no tomorrow. This could be the last moment she had to spend in his arms, with him buried inside of her where he belonged. He dipped his head and caught a nipple in his mouth, her hands sliding into his hair as she moaned in response. Their hips ground together, his skin brushing her clit, and too soon, she felt herself falling over the cliffs into the waves of her release, a cry escaping her lips as she shuddered in his arms. He took over, continuing to thrust within her, hard, fast, before he tossed his head back and shouted hoarsely his own release and she felt his seed fill her.

She fell against him, his arms wrapping around her. She knew this moment wouldn't last; she would go back to Cerberus, and he to the Alliance, but she would enjoy it while it lasted, because if she was going to attempt a suicide mission, she would take this moment with her – cherish it – and use it as the reason to come back. Alive.


End file.
